Issue 21 / Do You Have A Love Hate Relationship With Money?

Do You Have A Love Hate Relationship With Money?

Oct 27, 2015

Understanding whether you have an unhealthy or a healthy relationship with your money will be very telling of your current and future financial success. Here are some tips on recognizing your relationship status with your bucks. 

“Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people that they don't like.” ? Will Rogers

Have you paid attention to how you spend your money? Does this very question upset you and make you cringe? Do you really have to go on that vacation to Vegas? Start paying attention because understanding how you spend your money is very telling of your current perspectives on life and wellbeing. Your financial position is a key dimension to your overall happiness and fulfillment in life.

In the South Asian culture it has always been an expectation that the man manages all the finances. However, times are changing and both men and women are in the workforce and are equal investors in their current and future financial wellness. Today’s times require us all to be more aware and conscious of our own financial situation. A conversation with finance and lifestyle coach Satindar Gill opened my eyes to a realistic and educated way to think about money. Satindar Gill is also the owner and founder of Mortgage Brokers of Canada where his vast experience with individuals and families looking to advance their financial circumstances has brought to light some key lessons on how you can re-align your financial wellbeing to a more positive trajectory.

Here, Gill shares with us the signs he picks up on when an individual has an unhealthy relationship with money.

1. You Spend More Money Than You Make

This immediately indicates an unhealthy relationship with money. “Money is a commodity and is like any resource you have in your life and should be treated as such” Gill says. You set yourself up for life failures and unrealistic expectations for yourself and those around you when you spend more than what you earn.

2. You Spend Money To Impress Others

When newly dating or even in long-term relationships, Gill has seen clients, especially men, overspend to impress and take care of their partner. This is a red flag and can set the relationship up for failure. Living within your means not only manages expectations, it can relieve you from current and future stresses. Take a moment to get to know your partner and take care of your partner in more meaningful and sustainable ways that are effective to the core of the relationship.

3. You Don’t Have Any Savings

“Financial health is about spending money wisely, having reasonable debt, saving money to meet your goals while also having a safety net, such as insurance”, says Gill. When you don’t have any savings, it's an indication that you have not set some financial goals and dreams for yourself. Knowing how much to save from every pay check requires you to learn more about what you have to spend on and deciphering between your needs and wants.

4. You Have a Fear of the Unknown

Many people like to stay in the dark about their finances out of fear that they will not be able to understand it or manage it successfully. Understanding your asset to debt ratio and how much to save for retirement are all part of learning and budgeting for your current and future happiness and wellbeing. It is highly recommended that you take the first step in becoming more aware of your finances and where you stand financially in the big picture of your life.

5. You Have Negative Perceptions About Money

Your language about money is very telling about your inner beliefs which usually stem from childhood. “Financial health is about having a thoughtful relationship with money," Gill explains. His recommendation is to think back to how you were raised and how your family thought about money. What do you tell yourself when you see people who are rich? What is your inner talk? Do you despise people who are wealthy? This is telling of your negative connotations towards money. Start talking to family members to understand where your core beliefs may be coming from.

6. You Believe Money Will Make You Happy

The other extreme is to believe that you will only be happy if you have lots of money. This core belief can lead to negative financial situations and also lead to lowered levels of joy and happiness in one’s life. Ask yourself why you believe the things you do. This simple question will increase your own awareness about where your belief about money comes from and increase consciousness on how you can really be happy in life despite your financial situation.

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So do you really need to buy that Gucci bag? Can you hold off on that next vacation? Take a moment to pause and think about how you spend your money. If you need help, find a trustworthy and reputable financial advisor and coach and get yourself on the right track towards your financial goals. If reading is your comfort zone, then check out The Wealthy Barber by David Chilton, The Secret Language of Money by David Kreuger or Rich Dad Poor Dad by Rober Kiyosaki, to start. These are just a few reputable books that can open your eyes on how to live life more fully, save money and set yourself up for success.

Main Image Photo Credit:

Yvonne Sinniah


Yvonne Sinniah (@YvonneSinniah) is a Relations Advisor and inspirational speaker focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments.  focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments.  She is on a mission to meet a nee...


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